Day 22 Making Wrong Situations Right

Wisdom chooses to do now what you will be satisfied with later.  -Joyce Meyer

Last Monday I was having a challenging day and it seemed as if all day I was looking for something to complain about.  As I normally do on Mondays, I attended two Zumba classes: one at 5:30 and the other at 7:30.  Attendance in the 7:30 class is regulated to prevent overcrowding so I was in line 45 minutes before the class started to make sure I could get a spot. 

When it was almost time for class to begin, people began to file in and some were trying to cut the line.  I didn't mind one person cutting the line, but after awhile, there were several people trying to cut in line.  I couldn't take it.  I told one of the line cutters that she was wrong to cut and "encouraged" her to find her proper place in line.  She ignored me.  Again I "encouraged” her to move.  Again she ignored me.  The more she ignored me the more worked up I got.  The more worked up I became, the more I made it a point to let her know she was out of order.  Finally we had an exchange of words and off we went into class.  She did not advance to the front, instead, she was in the very back of the class. 
By the end of class, I realized that I had been out of order when I started policing the line.  That was not my job.  I felt bad about having words with the woman.  Immediately after class I looked for her, but she was gone.  The whole night I felt bad about what happened in class and I had regret over the way I handled the situation. 

The next time I saw her (three days later), she was sitting on a mat doing stretches.  I walked over to her and asked her if I could talk to her.  She gave me that "not-you-again-look, and with a tinge of skepticism, she agreed.  I understood her reluctance.  I swallowed a big gulp of my pride, sat down on the mat next to her, and apologized. 

I apologized for being rude and overbearing, and admitted to her that I had no right to play that role. She explained that when she realized the line situation, she knew she couldn’t cut the line and waited until everyone went in to find her spot in the back of the class.  She said she was fuming over the incident.  She graciously accepted my apology and thanked me for offering it.  We introduced ourselves to each other and I went on my way. 

We have all been involved in situations where we say or do things that I call "in-the-moment responses".  We react to situations without fully thinking through the impact of our words and actions.   Iyanla Vanzant wrote, ‘We create with our thoughts.  We create with our words. Our actions have a rippling effect on everything and everyone with whom we come in contact. We cannot afford to wag our tongues mindlessly.  In our ignorance, we create the very things we do not want.’  (Value in the Valley).
I learned a very good lesson from that situation.  I know that I do NOTwant to live with regret...I've never been able to find peace with regret.  Those three days between the incident at the gym and my apology were long enough.  I can not erase what happened, but I hope my "right" decision (apologizing), will reverse the impact of my “wrong” decision. 

Today I am grateful for the opportunity to make things right.  Traci H.