Thank You For My Legs

During the Christmas holidays this past year, I was going through old pictures with my Mom. I came across a picture of my great grandmother, Ruby Fisher, aka Boobie. We called her Boobie because my brother couldn't say Ruby, so henceforth and forevermore her name would be, Boobie. When I looked at the photo, the first thing I noticed was HER LEGS!! I snatched the picture from my Mother's hands and said, "Oh my God - those are MY legs!!" My Mom looked at me puzzled and mumbled something like, Mmm hmmm.  

My Great Grandmother Boobie in 1967

This photo was taken in 1967, a little less than a year before I was born. I remember Boobie, but my memories of her are from when she she was older and a little less agile- probably at least 6-8 years after this photo was taken. I remember her gentle spirit, her soft spokenness, and most of all, her love and care for my Mother and our family.  One thing I do not remember is those legs. 

Whenever I look at my legs, I'm always quick to pick apart everything I see wrong with them. I've wondered how I got so tall and why that bottom portion of my leg was so friggin long? It was seemingly longer than other tall women I have seen so I couldn't figure it out.  There are not very many tall women in my family, so I assumed my height came from the tall Howard side of my bloodline.  As soon as I saw the picture of Boobie, I felt a connection, and I had to probe my mother for more information.  How tall was she?  How old was she in this picture (we figured she was in her sixties)?  Tell me THIS story about her again.  What about this one?  I was enamored. 

A couple of weeks later back in San Diego, one of my best friends was flipping through pictures on my cell phone.  She came across a recent photo of me (photo is not included).  You would have to know her to understand how dramatic she was during the following interchange, but I hope you get the gist.  First she looked at the picture.  Then she looked back at me.  Then she looked back at the picture and then back at me again and said, Traci, please tell me what you see when you look at this picture!!!  "No, I said.  I'm embarrassed to tell you."  Then she said it again, but this time with more forcefulness.  "Tell me what you see when you see this picture!!!!!"  "Well," I said, "I hate this part of my legs; this part is too long and there's too much fat right there,"pointing to the inner part of my knees.  She said, "Are you crazy? When I looked at this picture, the FIRST thing I noticed was your legs!  They are amazing!!" 

She and I have had many conversations about our body image issues so I knew very well, the point she was trying to make.  She couldn't have known how much of an impact that conversation had on me.  My mind went immediately back to that picture of my great-grandmother Boobie. 

I asked my Mom to send me a copy of the picture of Boobie.  I needed it, because I knew somehow it was going to help me heal. 
I am writing about it today because I now have a new found appreciation for my legs.  Not in a narcissistic way - no, not at all.  I realize now that my legs are a blessing from God and from my great-grandmother.  She raised my Mom so I'm always excited to hear stories about her from my mother.  Most of the stories are about how she helped care for and spoil for my older brother - the first born grandchild on both sides of the family.  But now I have a story to tell about her.  

God made Boobie in His image and He made me in His image too.  While I know that I am uniquely made, there is no denying the power of DNA and family resemblance.  I am learning to love my legs.  Now when I look at them in the mirror, I think of Boobie and I say thank you instead of finding fault.

The next time my friend asks me what I see when I look at a picture of myself, I will say,  I see a woman who is wonderfully and fearfully made, and I see those amazing legs I got from my Grandma Boobie. 

My Legs 2/3/13 :-)

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.  My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.  Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.  Psalm 139:14-16